Matrescence: The Transformation Into Motherhood

Story by: Hannah Mersereau, LPC-MHSP

May is Maternal Mental Health Awareness Month, a time to openly share about the psychological impact of becoming a mother. This profound life experience can be joyful, exhausting, disorienting, awe-inspiring, isolating, meaningful, overwhelming, and beautiful—all at once. Motherhood is a time of significant physical, emotional, and hormonal changes, accompanied by relational and identity shifts.

This transition, known as matrescence, is similar to adolescence. Remember that messy, uncomfortable stage of moving from childhood into adulthood? Like adolescence, during matrescence your body does unfamiliar things, your hormones and emotions are funky, your relationships are shifting, and you’re figuring out this new version of yourself. Oh, and you’re caring for a brand-new life at the same time! Gosh, it can be rough.

Matrescence doesn’t happen in a single moment, as if your baby is born and all of the sudden you just “get it.” Rather, it’s a gradual and layered process that touches every part of your life. And like any major life transition, it takes time, support, and compassion to traverse. As a licensed professional counselor specializing in perinatal mental health, I remind my clients of this often. I also hear the quiet weight that so many mothers carry—a physical, emotional, and mental load that they believe they must bear alone. Believe me, you’re not the only one feeling this way. You’re just part of a conversation that we’re finally beginning to have. 

The truth is, perinatal mental health conditions are the number one complication of childbearing. One in five moms will experience depression or anxiety in the postpartum period. Struggling doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong or that you’re not good enough. It means you’re going through a big change. And you’re not alone.

Gentle Truths for This Season

You’re not supposed to have it all figured out. It’s okay to be a beginner when something is new. 

You can feel joy and grief at the same time. You can love your child and miss your old self.

You can ask for support and still be a great mom. And yes, it’s okay to do things just for you.

Connection and bonding are happening—even if you don’t feel connected all the time.

Change is really hard. It’s okay to experience growing pains.

A walk outside, a deep breath, or a simple meal is enough for today. The laundry or dishes do not define your worth.

Movement can help. So can stillness. Take a moment to listen to your body and honor what it needs.

Talking to a friend, getting some sunshine, or going to the park with your baby counts as care—for both of you.

You Are Not Alone: Where to Find Support

Motherhood doesn’t have to be shouldered alone. Whether you’re navigating anxiety or depression, identity shifts, loss, relationship changes, or just trying to find your footing—there is help, and there is hope.

Postpartum Support International offers free, compassionate support for all parents:

Peer support groups, educational materials, mentorship programs, and local provider directories are just a call or click away.

Website: www.postpartum.net

24/7 Helpline: 1-800-944-4773

You are not alone.

You are not to blame.

With help, you will be well.